Friday, June 29, 2012

Shit I Typed On 40 Sleeping Pills

What does fame actually mean? I started thinking about it, and felt unsure about whether or not it actually existed. Does it mean I know who that person is even though I've never met them "IRL"

Because in that case, everyone on the internet truly is famous.

Or does it mean something like, the majority of people in the world know who that person is even though they've never met them "IRL."


How much of your life is "How to capitalize on _________________"

How to capitalize on this relationship

How to capitalize on your 15 minutes etc

Would you rather be rich or relevant?

Which one seems worse to want? Is it wrong to want those things?

Do you think you've ever met a sociopath?

What the fuck does this sentence mean: "the systematic invalidation of the hierarchies of representational functions and techniques?"

Reminds me of the part in Lunar Park where Bret Easton Ellis is trying to think of a quote for someone's book and writes, "I haven't come across a work so 'resolutely about itself' in years"


I often google ______________sucks, or I hate _______________

I never thought about a person reading that in analytics and feeling sad. That's the thing, like, I don't necessarily feel like that thing sucks. I simply want to read a person talking about why another thing sucks. As a matter of fact, it seems like I would be more likely to google that if I really liked something. I feel interested in why people like or dislike things, or like--especially in a passionate way, why people hate certain things. It feels fascinating.

I really like abstractions actually. It seems like that's the only thing that is interesting. Outside of concrete facts, like, abstractions are the only thing that really separates people.

Like some person feels really disgusted by fat people, and another person is only turned on by really fat people.

That's a reason why you really can't count on your opinion. Like, "if you want to decrease suffering in the world, this is what you should do." There is no universal way to decrease suffering. Seriously. You would have to say like, If you want to decrease suffering FOR MOST PEOPLE, or a majority of people, in the context of my worldview about how to decrease suffering, this is what you should do.

Someone taught me something about writing once, that I seem to have forgotten. It's unecessary to say, "I think_________________because anything you say is clearly what you think. It's self evident.

What decreases suffering for most people will increase suffering for some people.

I think I've said things before like, "I want to know everything." I truly want to know everything. I want to know things inside and out. I become obsessed with things for very brief periods.

Sometimes I am like why am I reading this? Why is this person talking, and why do they think it's important to say these things? Sometimes everything feels so meaningless to me that it hurts. And I really can't get into that shit.

I kind of feel like people comparing other people to Jesus is like---unconscionable or something. I mean, the jesus of something. It seems stupid that anyone would look at another person that way. The next book I write will deal with this issue, I think. Like the absurdity of worshiping another thing.

It's hard for me to feel really enamored with things. I want to understand things.

You really can't understand something without acknowledging the reality of that thing. Like I need to know why people like it and why people hate it to understand it fully, I think.

I'm fascinated by self absorption.

Seems LITERALLY unbelievable that racism/homophobia/sexism exist. The idea that certain colors, though, in particular, are inferior in some way really seems INSANE to me. Racism really is a kind of mental illness I think. I understand sexism definitely.

Also feel like I REALLY don't 'get' homophobia. I get sexism, kind of. I mean, not that I think it's like..."right," but it seems to make the most sense. Homophobia makes no sense. Like, I don't understand how a gay person would be threatening in any way. It also really does seem to me that the most homophobic people are the ones who are like, "I mean I hooked up with a guy once or whatever."

Why do people, (including at times) myself think that animal behavior somehow explains human behavior?

Asked directly by Mojo magazine whether the famously romance-shy icon has discovered love, he replied: "Yes I have, yes I have. I mean it's completely false, of course."

When I look at a beautiful thing or person, it does make me feel "happy," but I never think, "I really want to fuck that thing."



  1. I just randomly stumbled across this while trying to remember who wrote the line "so resolutely about itself" and wow, it's actually kinda good (not an insult to you, just the internet). But how are you alive on forty sleeping pills, i mean I get that it's hyperbole, but once you're doing that why stop at 40? you could write four hundred or four thousand. so, not a realistic or very cogent point, but it was bugging me.
    ..Anyway, great blog!

  2. Thanks "organicrobot." I literally mean/meant 40. I thought of taking a picture and putting it up, but that seemed juvenile. I guess I'm not dead because I've perfected the cocktail/tolerance.