Friday, March 15, 2013

Week in Review

"Hurting you reminds me of petting a small cat. They always seem like they want you to stop, and then when you do, they're back at you, rubbing their face against your hand."


"Instead of taking 30 sleeping pills, why don't I just take like two and see if I get tired," I thought.


"I used to think emoticons were stupid, but now I understand that they are the only logical way to express yourself."


What 'Dating' Me is Like (NOT HOW YOU THINK).

We are "making out" on your couch, and you are wearing a suit for some reason, because we are both wasted, even more than usual. I start laughing because, in my head, I can't stop imagining this:


So, you're like, "Why are you laughing?" and I'm like, I don't really want to talk about it. So you keep kissing me, but I'm like, laughing into your mouth, and I'm like "Okay, okay. I'm laughing's stupid that you're wearing a suit, and I keep picturing you with a horse head. Like, I just keep envisioning a suit with a fucking horse head attached to it." You look at me like I'm stupid, and then you start like pulling my hair and mashing my face, but I keep laughing. "Look," I say, "Being more 'brutal' won't help because like...that's what a horse head in a suit would do." You like, climb off of me and sit down and shake your head. "I can't have sex right now," I say, "But do you want to teach me how to do calculus?"

"Seriously?" You ask.

"Yeah, seriously. I mean, I'm pretty good at math, but the less actual numbers there are, the more I get confused. If you teach me how to do calculus, I might see you as like a professor or something instead of a horse head."






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